Comet Comes Closer to Earth Than Any Other Comet EVER

Filed under: 1770 > 1770s > Charles Messier > Astronomy > Comet > God > lol >


Yikes, we need to start building ourselves a comet shelter!!!

French Astronomist Charles Messier discovered a comet dangerously close to Earth. Lexell’s Comet, which is four times the visual diameter of the moon, approached the Earth at a distance of 1,400,000 mi!!! That may sound like a bazillion years away, but it’s actually the closest a comet has come to Earth in all of recorded history!

Space is SO scary. If the aliens take us away, we really hope they at least have space church.

Come to think of it, space sermons would probs be a LOT less boring than regular Earth sermons… maybe an alien abduction wouldn’t be so bad after all!

(Don’t tell God we said that, LOL!)

Who Wore it Best?!?!!?

imagejean marc nattier

These trained models even make animal fur look innocent! Amazeballs!!!

Artist Jean-Marc Nattier painted both of these models as Diana, the Roman goddess of hunting. 

Hunting hearts, probably! LOLz.

We love that Madame Bouret (bottom) is smiling with her eyes, but we can’t stop looking at Mary Adelaide’s (top) elegant hands.

Who do U think wore it best?!!?

Quote of the Day

Filed under: History > LOL > Quote of the Day > 1733 > 1730s >


“History is nothing more than a tableau of awesomeness, sex, scandal, crimes and misfortunes.”

- Voltaire

GASP! Charter of Connecticut Missing!!! Supposedly Hidden in Oak Tree!!

charter oak sneaky

Seriously?! This is HIGHlarious!!

Remember how Connecticut was granted an unusual amount of self-government in its royal charter by King Charles II?? Well the new King of England wants to take it back! Governor of the Dominion of New England, Sir Edmund Andros, went to Connecticutie to fetch the charter but ran into very unexpected problems.

At the meeting where Andros demanded the charter, someone killed the lights and the document was supposedly smuggled out the window!! Some say it is hidden in the hollow of an oak tree nearby.

Omg, we LOVE it!! We hope the Brits never find it!!

Long live American freedom, bitches!!!!!!

STFU!!! Bacon Burns Jamestown to the Ground!!

nathaniel bacon hey girl

With those eyes, he can take us hostage any day of the week!!

Nathaniel Bacon wrote a Declaration of the People of Virginia which complains that Governor Sir William Berkeley is levying unfair taxes, failing to protect colonists from Indian attacks and appointing his friends to high positions. Then, to show he means business, Bacon attacked the friendly Pamunkey Indians and with a group of about 500 men burned Jamestown to the ground!!

They’re calling it “Bacon’s Rebellion,” but it sounds more like “Bacon’s Rampage” to us. SWB has reportedly fled the area for safety.

Burning Jamestown sounds a little dramatic, and we’re also disappointed that Bacon attacked the nice Indians. ‘Sup with that?!?!

Oh well, being a seXXXy rebel DOES comes with a price. He doesn’t sound like the sharpest axe in the shed.


New Netherland Woman Accuses Neighbor of Stealing Her Beaver

Filed under: 1660s > 1665 > Laws > lol > Unfamous >


Gossip, scandal AND beavers?!?? LOVES it!

Grietje Pieters went over to her neighbor Lysbet Ackermans' house to have a beer. Soon after the hangout, Lysbet accused Grietje of stealing her beaver from her home. Grietje was so angry about the accusation that she sued Lysbet for slander. Lysbet quickly changed her story in court and stated that she only innocently asked Grietje, “I lost a beaver, have you got it?”

With no evidence to prove anything, the court threw out the case. Sadly for Grietje, the damage is already done. EVERYONE’S talking about how Grietje really did steal Lysbet's beaver. 

Hmmm, we wouldn’t put it past her. After all, she DID have a beer and that makes people do really silly things. Trust us. We know. LOL!

Do U think Grietje stole Lysbet's beaver????

coLOLnists Make Us LOLOLOLOL!!!!

Filed under: LOL > Silly >

scumbag pilgrim meme steals peace pipe

OMG, we are just DYING over these!!!!

You MUST check out coLOLnists' totally awesome pics of people in America with funny phrases written on them!!

Our day just got soooo much better!

CLICK HERE to see more of the HIGHlarious pics!!!

Portrait Hall of Fame

Filed under: 1651 > Portrait > Portrait Hall of Fame > LOL > 1650s >

David Bailly with laser eyes

Um, wut.  ????

This is a self-portrait of the Dutch artist David Bailly. Supposedly this is classic example of “vanitas” art, which uses weird objects likes skulls to represent the meaninglessness of life and vanity.

Wow Dave, this was a REALLY uplifting picture of you.

Excuse us while we go cut ourselves and contemplate our mortality.

Portrait Hall of Fame!!

We caught you, Sir Anthony van Dyck!!! LOLz.

Check out another FABOOSH self-portrait by Tony as he gently caresses a beautiful sunflower.

Ugh, we would give ANYTHING to be that sunflower!! BTW, we are loving the volume on his hair!! How does he do it???!

Keep the portraits coming, bb!! We just ADORE you!!!

Anne Hutchinson Goes on Trial


Uh oh, someone’s been a bad girl!

A super preggers Anne Hutchinson has been put on trial for the charge of “traducing [speaking badly of] the ministers”. She’s been the talk of the town since she left her place in the kitchen to oppose strict religious orthodoxy in Massachusetts and the subordination of fellow women.

She stated during the trial:

"I feare none but the great Jehovah, and I doe verily beleeve that he will deliver me out of our hands, therefore take heed how you proceed against me; for I know that for this you goe about to doe to me, God will ruine you and your posterity, and this whole state.”

Wow, those are some BIG words for such a small woman!

What do U think about Anne Hutchinson's beliefs???